A few weeks ago in June, I was journaling and realized something I hadn’t even considered: I was homemaking in survival mode.
To be honest, I was doing everything in survival mode: mothering, serving my husband, and even my faith-life was somehow not a place of pleasure or optimism, but of dread, groaning, and absentmindedness.
The Prompt
🌷Who are you inviting into your sanctuary? Journal about the boundary between being hospitable and protecting the peace of your home. If Yahusha walked into your home today, what is the one thing you would feel most at peace showing Him, and what would you want to hide?
Journaling through this prompt showed me three things:
- I was using “minimalism” as an excuse to do the minimum. Ouch
- I’ve been “protecting my peace” so much it made me guarded and resistant against hospitality, something we are ordained to do
- I was afraid to get attached to my home, based on past experiences. I thought it wasn’t safe to love my home and be happy about it, because in my mind, eventually it would be ripped from me
—Do you struggle submitting to the Biblical ideals of femininity and holy womanhood? Angry instead of calm, bitter isntead of surrendered, or anxious instead of focused?
This is something we all come face to face with, especially those of us in repentance. You’re not walking alone, though. Hephzibah Femininity Journaling Club is a space for aspiring Biblical women like you and me who write through journal prompts just like the one above, every week, together. Have revelations about yourself, see your greatest needs to prayer on the paper, and join a community of sisters striving together as the Bride of Yahuah.
It’s kind of crazy what we can realize about our hearts and minds when we can see our thoughts on paper. All of this just made me see what was in my way: absolutely nothing. So why was I creating obstacles for myself?
Why do we accept survival mode? Why do we moan and groan in homemaking; procrastinate small things; neglect big things; refuse to invest our resources?
I’m inclined to believe that we know our homes are just temporary dwellings, filled with temporary possessions. But what if they weren’t?
What if our homes weren’t just temporary dwellings filled with temporary possessions? What if homemaking is the cultivation of something with eternal impact, whose substance impacts more lives than we can see?
Would our approach and attitudes change if we believed something different? Well, of course. When I talk to or observe older homemakers, they all seem to take such great pride in their homes. Whether tiny apartments, cozy cottages, or sprawling estates, these aged women seem to know something we don’t:
Your home is a sanctuary. A sanctuary is a holy place. Biblically, a holy place is dedicated to Yahuah, and belongs completely to Him. That means homemaking, then, truly is an act of worship; service in building and maintaining His Church. In the Bible, the “Church” is just another word for Body or Bride, since we are the Bride of Yahuah.
If we imagine ourselves in a Holy Temple, would we be rushing through the process of removing ashes from the altar? Would we feel dread when we think about dipping into the mikvah, the holy bath that cleanses us and prepares our spirits for the work? If our homes were truly Holy Temples, would we procrastinate setting fire to the lovely frankincense and myrrh, or would we run to that Sweet-smelling Savor?
When I was homemaking in survival mode, it wasn’t just my home that was impacted. I felt it in my health, the way I was always tense and sore; how little rest I got; how irritable I always felt.
I felt the ‘survival mode’ in my family’s daily life: laundry was never folded and in it’s proper place; dishes weren’t clean and would smell in the sink, or I’d have to wash a plate just to be able to have a noon snack; my son would be hyper-active due to being stuck indoors all day with nowhere to burn his energy, because mommy was “too tired” to take him outside for thirty minutes.
If I must be entirely transparent, I didn’t and still don’t have a solution to this. I’m not like this in every season, but in the seasons where it does hit, I find that only one thing actually works.
Scripture. That’s where I find my strength renewed, my courage restored, my joy revitalized in Yahuah. Scripture guides me with wisdom when my own words fail; inspires me with Psalms of praise when my heart is too weak to just say “HalleluYAH”; grounds me in the eternal Truth that I don’t have to be perfect to get through this life in one piece, I just have to persevere in Yahuah’s Grace.
If we’re serious about homemaking, well then we need to be serious about that Bible!
What does homemaking look like for you in this season? What does your working process look like? Are you consistent, do you have energy, are you expressing joy and vibrancy and gratitude when it’s time to tackle chores, change diapers, or spend time with family?
Or is everything a burden? If it is, the Good News is that His yolk is easy, His burden is light; and He is sufficient for all your needs. And with that kind of Good News, there’s no bad news that can stand.
May I share a prayer with you for coming out of survival mode as a homemaker?
🌷Abba Yahuah,
I come to You worn down from carrying so much for so long. Survival has been my normal, and I am asking You to teach me rest.
“Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28)
Yeshua, You promised rest for the weary. I want to receive it, not just read about it. Loosen my grip on control. Help me trust that a peaceful home does not require me to be depleted.
“He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength.” (Isaiah 40:29)
Renew my strength, Yah. Let me tend my home from a place of rest instead of running on empty.
“She watches over the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness.” (Proverbs 31:27)
Let this be true of me not because I am striving, but because I am walking in peace with You.
“You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You.” (Isaiah 26:3)
Set my mind on You today, Yah. Let my home be a place of shalom, and let me be a woman resting in You, not just surviving.
In Yeshua’s name, amen.
